I was blessed with opportunity to send most of the last 2 weeks in the Philippines with group from Tampa Underground doing an “experiential externship in poverty and mission.”
I got to share a little bit about the experience this past Sunday. See the video below…
The difference between our externship and a mission trip is we didn’t go to build a building, teach bible school to kids, bring money, or serve in some other way.
We went to experience life in community with the Filipino people who live with very little and learn from them.
My roommate, Brent, and I stayed with Pastor Mel and Ate Faye in the small town of Pinugay Baras in the province of Rizal, which 27 miles east of Manila, but takes 3 hours to get to in Manila traffic.
To be honest, many aspects of our stay were uncomfortable…
The 32 hour trip, including a 7 hour layover in Chicago and 15 hr flight to Hong Kong were pretty uncomfortable.
The weather in the Philippines is similar to Florida in the Summer, except in Pinugay Baras no one has air conditioning. So, it’s uncomfortably warm most of the time, and we were uncomfortably sweaty most of the time.
Trying to sleep was rough. Around 10pm the neighborhood dogs would start barking, at 4am the roosters started crowing, and in between Brent snored like a motorcycle in the bed next to me. (love you, bro 🙂 ). Even with earplugs it was challenging to get good sleep.
There were other challenges too… the bathroom situation, the language barrier, cultural differences.
So, why go through the discomfort?
Couldn’t we have just sent money instead of going there?
Couldn’t we have stayed in an air conditioned hotel and done daytrips into poor areas to help people?
Sure. And to be clear, I’m not criticizing people who choose those options. People in poorer countries need financial support. Serving can be beneficial to both the giver and recipient.
Following Jesus’s Example
The second day of our trip, our scripture reading and devotional time was based on John 1, and specifically verse 14:
The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. – John 1:14
Jesus, co-creator of the universe, chose to become a human being a live with us.
He chose to abandon the comfort of heaven, to join us in the muck and the messiness of life on earth.
Why?
He could have just sent the resources we need from afar, right?
He could have been born into a wealthy family and lived in a comfortable, luxurious home and ventured out periodically to help those in need, right?
But He didn’t.
I don’t presume to understand all the reasons Jesus chose to become human and live among the poor, common people, but I think…
One of the big reasons he did it was Love
In his book, the 5 Love Languages, Gary Chapman explains 5 general ways people show love to one another. They include:
- Physical touch
- Shared experiences
- Words of affirmation
- Acts of service
- Gifts
For just about all of them you need to be present with the person to use that language (or it greatly enhances the expression).
Read through the list again and imagine the difference between not being present and then being present when its expressed. Huge difference, right?
5 New Love Languages
What became clear to me in the Philippines, though, is that these aren’t the only “love languages.” There are other are other things we can do to express love for someone that can only be done when we are present with them.
1. Be Seen Together
Many people who are poor, disadvantages or face injustice are constantly told (implicitly or explicitly) they don’t matter, they are second-class citizens. When we are willing to be seen with them, it communicates dignity, value and equality.
I’m not talking about photo-ops in which people try to look like they care about people but make no personal connections.
I’m talking about visiting someone’s neighborhood, visiting their home, treating them as equals. One of the things the kids we visited seemed to enjoy most was taking selfies together, sharing and tagging each other on social media.
2. Listen to Your Story
Another way we can show we care about someone is to ask them about their story, to listen, and ask questions. It shows we are genuinely interested in them, and we are willing to take the time to slow down and hear them.
3. Walk in Your Shoes
A willingness to see and experience parts of a person’s life demonstrates interest and love, whether it’s visiting someone’s home, going with them as they serve, or the most extreme, actually living with them.
It’s one thing to hear about the challenges a person faces, but it’s completely different to experience them for yourself. The experience brings a greater level of understanding and empathy.
4. Stand with You
Often when we see poverty and hardship from a distance, we try to rationalize it, excuse it, or assume the hardships are their own fault. Sometimes we think, “They are probably lazy, or not that smart, or made poor choices.”
That could be true of someone, but we’ll never know we don’t take the time to get to know the person, hear their story, and walk in their shoes. When we do these things, often we hear stories of abuse, discrimination, injustice, lack of access to education or financial resources.
If it was your own son or daughter, brother or sister, mother or father facing these challenges would you stand idly by?
Or would your love for that person compel you to stand with them and against injustice even if at the risk of some personal cost?
5. Partner with You
When we genuinely love someone, we want to work together with them to accomplish things that are close to their heart.
How do we know what is close to someone’s heart? You guessed it – by spending time with them and getting to know them and their story.
When we genuinely love someone, we see it as a partnership of equals. I have some things you lack, you have things I lack, and together we can accomplish something that we could not accomplish on our own.
It could be as simple as a one-time trash cleanup or as big and complex as starting a business or nonprofit with them.
Resist the Temptation to…
During one of the learning sessions we had on the trip, after explaining all of the challenges people face in the slums of Manila, the speaker told us something I found to be very profound. He said (paraphrasing)…
Resist the temptation to go in and solve the problem… Instead, focus on your relationship with Jesus, spend time getting to know people in need, and let the Holy Spirit lead you.
This cannot be done from 9,000 miles away.
It cannot be done by staying in our comfortable, American middle-class neighborhoods.
It cannot be done by just sending money.
It can only be done when we are willing to sacrifice our own comfort, sacrifice our time, spend time with people, and let Jesus show us the next step.
Doing this will not “solve the problem” of poverty in the Philippines, the US, or anywhere else. But I believe it is that way of Jesus, the way of the kingdom of God, and the way to love people… one person at a time.
What do you think?