Most people I know like Jesus. The Christians I know say they love Him, they trust Him, and so on. Most of the people I know who are not Christians say Jesus was a good guy or wise teacher or something nice and neutral like that.
But Jesus also said a lot of radical things most people would rather ignore. By most people I mean both Christians and people who are not Christians. And I mean me.
My church is going to do a series of Sunday services called Jesus Uncensored, so I started reading through the Bible for the things Jesus said that make me squirm in my seat. I looked for those sayings that most pastors never preach on because they know they wouldn’t get many fist bumps on the way out. You know the ones where if they every come up in conversation, you look for some way to explain why we shouldn’t take it literally or it was only relevant to the people in that culture.
I came across more than I would have liked.
Then I imagined what I might say back to Jesus.
“Martha, Martha, you are worried and distracted by many things; there is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part.”
Excuse me. I was finishing up work, checking my email, texting my friend, trading stock on the Shanghai Exchange, and booking a cruise to Jamaica. Did you say something?
“If your eye causes you to stumble, pluck it out.”
Well, it’s not my eye that’s causing me to stumble, it’s that hot chick over there. So, can I keep the eye?
“Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.”
Doesn’t the golden rule take precedence here? Isn’t the Christian thing to do is to treat people the way they treat you. If people are nice to you, be nice to them. If people are jerks to you, then it’s ok to be a jerk back. I’d prefer that option.
“When someone strikes you on one cheek, turn and offer to him the other one.”
That’s just dumb. Next.
“I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”
Come on, dude. That’s so totally intolerant. I want to believe that when we get to heaven we’re going to find people of all faiths living together in harmony. Aren’t all religions are really about the same things – peace, harmony, drinking good wine out of golden chalices, and stuff like that?
“I come not to bring peace, but to bring a sword.”
Huh? Who are you??? Get your blade-wielding self out of here and send in the nice Jesus with the white robe, flowing hair, and beaming smile that we all like.
“It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.”
I’ll tell you what, Jesus… you give me a million dollars and I will find a way to squeeze through anything.
“Sell all you have and give the money to the poor.”
You were just talking to that one really rich dude, right?
“So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things… But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness…”
Really, Jesus I don’t want to be a burden. Wouldn’t it be easier for both of us if you focus on your kingdom and I focus on building mine?
“Anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me”
Whoah, Jesus. My kids? You know I love my wife and kids more than anything in the world. You want me to put you ahead of them? Isn’t 2nd or 3rd place good enough for you?
“For I tell you that unless your righteousness surpasses that of the Pharisees and the teachers of the law, you will certainly not enter the kingdom of heaven.”
Those Pharisees were total dorks. I’m cool, right? What’s that? Um, yeah, I’ve done that. And that. And I slip up there almost every day. OK, OK, I admit it -no matter how hard I try, I’m a messed up selfish slug most of the time.
“Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.”
But Jesus, but I like my life. It’s nice and comfortable. Yeah, I know I just said I’m messed up and all. And I know I know you promise to give me a whole new better life – one of peace, freedom, and fulfillment. But it’s just so hard to let go. Show me how to let go.
Honestly, these are more like the questions I expected to come up in this series. The first week I was thinking, “Really? ‘Take up my yoke’? It says His yoke is easy and burden is light. That’s one of the verses that gives me comfort – to know that He wants me to trade the difficult and heavy for the light and easy. I was expecting the ‘if your eye offends you’ verse and the ‘eye of the needle’ verse for a series of things we wish Jesus hadn’t said.
Corinne, thanks for the comment. I’ve heard it said as Christians we are to comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable. So far the series at Cypress has seemed to focus more on comforting, which is good for those who are disturbed. The series isn’t over yet, though.